My Husband Resents Me! How to Improve Your Marriage Starting Today
Article by Gillian Reynolds
Feeling that your husband isn’t completely and utterly in love with you can be uncomfortable. When a wife starts to have serious doubts about what her husband feels for her it can undermine the foundation of their relationship with one another. Resentment is often at the root of this and if you choose to ignore it, your marriage will surely suffer. If you’re a woman who has been thinking to herself, “my husband resents me,” now is the time to change that. Unless you address why he resents you, you’ll never be able to move forward towards a balanced, happy and content relationship.
If you’ve been saying to yourself, “my husband resents me,” try and pinpoint what caused him to start feeling that way initially. In some cases it’s born from an argument that never really gets resolved. If your husband feels that you pushed him into saying he was wrong when he didn’t really feel that way, he’ll begin to resent you. The same is true if you made him apologize for something that he didn’t feel deserved an apology. Some women taken it upon themselves to throw their husband the cold shoulder until he says he is sorry. If you’ve done anything like this, you can certainly understand why your spouse may begin to resent you.
Another common reason behind resentment in a marriage centers on the children. If you happen to be closer to your children than your husband is, he may feel some resentment over that. Perhaps you don’t work as often as he does and you’re able to spend more time with the children. Obviously this is helpful to them and you but it may prove hurtful to your husband because he’ll feel he’s missing out on the precious moments with them.
Dealing with resentment requires patience and a great deal of tact. You need to address the situation without pushing your husband anymore. To begin with try and identify what you feel is causing him to resent you. Then you need to talk calmly and openly with him about it. Allow him the opportunity to express why he feels the way he does and learn from that. If you can absorb what he tells you and then use that information to change whatever is causing the issue, you’ll find your marriage will improve greatly.
It’s important to make it clear to your spouse that you’re willing to take whatever steps are necessary to move your marriage to a more positive and healthy place. Ensure that he understands that although you can see that he resents you, you want to work with him to move past those feelings. If he senses that you are being genuine, he’ll be that much more willing to allow the resentment to grow and be replaced with adoration.
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Specific things you do and say can compel your husband to appreciate and love you more. Saying or doing the wrong thing can actually cause him to feel even more distant from you. You can make your husband fall even deeper in love with you than when you two first married.