It is amazing how many people will carefully check legal marriage requirements but not pay any attention to what it takes for a marriage to be successful.   Women especially seem to get focus on the pomp and ceremony of the wedding to the point that deeper issues are ignored. It is so easy to get caught up in the romance of the occasion and to forget that while your wedding day is a big event, it is the start of something so much bigger. 

Getting married is a commitment and should be treated as such.  Too many people give longer thought to where to go on vacation than to whether or not it’s a good idea to get married.

One of the most stressful and traumatic events anyone can experience is living through the breakup of a marriage.  It is difficult to see all your dreams of happiness with another person die. 

So what can you do to prevent landing in a similar situation? One good thing is to really know each other before you commit to marriage. I’m often surprised at how little some couples know about each other before they get married. A very helpful way to deepen communication and make your relationship closer is 1000 Questions for Couples. I honestly believe that every couple would benefit from using that book is part of their preparation for marriage.

 

It also helps to realize from the start that every marriage will face difficulties.  It is unrealistic to expect your spouse to fulfill all aspects of your life. You have to a happy individual in your own right or you will make both of you miserable.  You need to have some degree of independence even though you are part of a couple. You need to show your partner love, respect and loyalty while still giving them and expecting them to give you the freedom to have a life of your own. Your relationship will be much more successful if everyone involved has room to develop and breathe. 

If you have kids you still need to make your relationship a priority. Children certainly do need time and attention, but you should do it together and also know you need love and support yourself.

You can also learn a lot from Internet courses. I suggest that you take a look at Save My Marriage Today to find out more about an excellent marriage-saving program. Even though it’s meant for marriages in trouble the ideas and techniques you learn can help prevent your marriage from getting into trouble in the first place.

You need to do things as a couple and spend quality time together. Like a beautiful garden, a loving relationship thrives with some attention.  Romantic gestures are always appreciated, and sometimes even more so when there’s no special reason.

It also helps her relationship with your able to take advantage of psychological triggers to main a close, romantic connection with your spouse. Second Chance Romance is a relationship system that teaches just such triggers.

Perhaps the main marriage requirement is a commitment to develop both personally and as a couple in such a way that the love and respect and desire you have to be together on your wedding day only grows over time.